Saturday, July 30, 2011

Blue Suede Paint War

(Omigoodness, a post that has nothing to do with JIMMY FALLON??)

My babies are awesome.  We tried to make this week special since Dad was pretty much nonexistent (working long hard hours!) so we made play-dough, went to the drive-in, made cookies and had a paint war.  Life is good.

And some pictures in case I decide to ever make a blog book.  (I feel another project bunny spawn coming on . . .)

Oops, missed the template there a little!  Oh well.

Wednesday, July 27, 2011

How Jimmy Fallon inadvertently made me a person of Walmart.

I know I have the tendency to ramble on, so I tried to bold the important bits that prove I can truly pin this on Jimmy.

Our budget is pretty tight.  We get a great discount on flights since Brett works for American, but the discounted tickets to paycheck ratio is not awesome, so we have to be careful how often we fly or we get no paycheck.  Though we originall planned on going to Sacramento and NYC this August, we honestly thought our NYC plans were ruined when we failed to secure Late Night tickets.  So instead of flying to NYC we flew our family to SLC for a reunion.  NYC airfare money spent!

Well then Jimmy (ie LNJF's audience coordinator) gets us tickets.  Something I honestly in a million years never thought would happen.  I guess I am more persuasive (twitter-spam-annoying) than I thought because NYC IS BACK ON! But that NYC airfare money?  Gone.  We need more cash to be able to make this trip happen!  So of course, being the responsible wonderful awesome husband and father and provider that he is, Brett picks up extra shifts to pay for a hotel in and airfare to NYC.  And when I mean extra shifts, I mean an extra shift every day.  This guy is working from 8 am til 12 am. Without complaint. Are you starting to understand why I love this man so much?  Well Brett starts this crazy shift before we get a chance to go grocery shopping.

So we are a 1 car family, and our 1 car is now gone from 7:30 am til 12:30 am. and there is no food in the house. My kids are not awake at either of those times so it makes it hard (not to mention expensive) to drive him.  He comes home the first night of working this ridiculous shift to a super stank wife who, instead of loving on him and telling him how awesome he is demands, "did you buy milk on your way home?" to which he should have replied, "back off woman, I just worked 16 hours and I'm tired and was thinking about going to bed the second I got home because I would have to be awake in 7 hours to go back to work the next morning so, no I didn't even think to buy your stupid milk on the way home."
I think what he actually said was, "no, I'm sorry" to which I should have thrown my arms around his neck and kissed the beejuz out of him for being so good, but instead I think I gave him more stank attitude. 

So totally put-out, I take the car grocery shopping at the only time I have it (1:30 a.m.) to the only grocery store open at that hour (wal-mart). To make matters worse, I haven't showered that day because I am gross like that, I am still in my pajamas and last but not least (unrealized by me until I actually arrived) I did not put a bra on.  
Yeah I was gross.

And thus, I became a person of Walmart.  Courtesy of Jimmy Fallon. 

So if you've ever wondered what kind of person does the full-on grocery shopping run at 2:00 in the morning, now you know.

I didn't stop to take a full-body picture.  YOU'RE WELCOME.
P.S.  I still think I have 1 degree left, in which I would like to mention that the 6 degrees game is most commonly referenced with Kevin Bacon, who it all really comes back to, ya know?

P.P.S.  If you are friends with me on facebook you have seen the unedited version of this photo.  Yes I photoshopped out my huge eyebrow zit.  And again, YOU'RE WELCOME.

P.P.P.S.  (seriously kristina?  YES!) Now I want you all to know that I felt very repentant of my attitude towards my dear sweet awesome husband almost the second I pulled out of our parking lot.  When I came home from the store at 2:30 in the morning and unloaded all 3 trips of groceries up the stairs to our second floor apartment I sat down and wrote him the most heartfelt "forgive me" note known to man.  Unfortunately it made a lot more sense at 2:30 am then it did at 7:00 am when he read it, but I think he got the gist of it.  I quote, "I love you so much, and if I expressed how much I loved you at even 50% capacity 100% of the time you would be blown away by expresso-love."

UPDATE:  I added the whole video for those who were confused about the Shia/Andy reference. I'm almost afraid to underwhelm you, but it is a Foutz Family Favorite.

Sunday, July 24, 2011

Dear Kristina Foutz,

Dear Kristina,
You so rock.

Late Night with Jimmy Fallon

Okay, so it wasn't THAT epic, but it was pretty dang epic. Just got this email.

Dear Kristina,

Thank you for your interest in tickets to Late Night with Jimmy Fallon! Some
of the writers recently spotted your online plea to obtain tickets to an
August taping. We would love to help out a die hard fan of the show. If you
think you can still make the trip to NYC, we would like to set aside two VIP
tickets to the show on August 10th. Please see attached instructions for
ticket pick up.

Happy 5th Anniversary!

Brandon D.

Oh. My. Holy. Crap. We're going to see JIMMY!!!!

So I have to thank everyone that helped out, I know our video got posted and reposted on Facebook 298X and my original blog letter got reposted 238X.  The video recieved 500+ views, and at one point the blog was getting a hit every 2 minutes.  Not exactly viral, but not bad for a letter that started in LUBBOCK TEXAS!  We made it to New York you guys, courtesy of awesome you guys!

Special thanks to Patrick Borelli.  I am 100% convinced that it was his intervention that got us noticed by the Audience coordinator.  But if anyone else from LNJF wants to refute that, feel free!

Now excuse me, I have some more girlish squealing and hokey dancing to take care of.

Thursday, July 21, 2011

Dear Jimmy Fallon: I made you a video.

A little update.
Up to this very second this video has been shared on facebook over 30X (I posted it in the wee hours last night so that's pretty awesome) and my letter has been shared 222X on facebook. Cool.
Pretty much I have the best friends and family ever. And they have the best friends and family ever. And so on.

Thank you thank you thank you everyone! and Thank you, youtube, for finding the most awkward image in my video and choosing it for the main still and thumbnail.

Tuesday, July 12, 2011

Dear Jimmy Fallon

Dear Jimmy,

I blew it.

This year for our 5th anniversary my husband and I planned on dropping our kids off with Grandma in Sacramento, California and flying to New York for 3 days. The plans were going so well. We were doing NYC low-budget but that was ok, because we had a dream, and our dream was to see a live-taping of Late Night with Jimmy Fallon.

If I wanted to make a short story long and run the risk of possibly boring you, I might go into detail how as a young couple going to school and working alternating hours the only time we were able to be together generally started around 11:30 p.m. CST. I might mention that we only had 2 channels that our bunny ears antenna picked up, and I could possibly continue on about how we strengthened our marriage through laughter and a communal love for good stand-up comedy. If I really wanted to wax long on how much Late Night with Jimmy Fallon has meant to us I might continue to talk about how it has been an important tradition in our marriage for the last five years (okay we watched Conan for a few years but he was just a gateway host), and how the culminating event of our 5 year marriage was to enjoy a live taping of Late Night with Jimmy Fallon. But I don’t want to rattle on, so I’ll try to keep it short.

And the short of it is that after calling every other day for weeks, I somehow missed the window to aquire tickets for Late Night with Jimmy Fallon from August 9th, 10th, or 11th. Hence the blowing of the Anniversary trip.

I wish I could say that I was so involved in caring for my two young children that I didn’t have time to call in and get the tickets. But honestly I was probably sitting in front of the computer googling “cheap hotels in New York City.” Or even more likely I was hitting “stumble” over and over again in an internet-induced coma.

Long story shorter, no tickets.

My Husband took the bad news in stride. He pointed out that we really couldn’t afford the trip anyway, and since the ultra-magnetic pull of possibly being able to see a taping of Late Night with Jimmy Fallon was gone, we would probably be better off sticking close to Sacramento for our anniversary. Now my googling changed to “cheap hotels in Sacramento.” Until my dear sweet starving student of a husband noticed what I was doing.

I cannot say anything bad about my husband. He works long hard hours. He is a full-time student. He is an amazing father. He is a beyond wonderful man. But some times he does fall a little short on romance. Especially on this occasion when he insisted, “I’m not spending money on a Hotel when we have some place we can stay for free.”

Some place we can stay for free. At his mother’s house. For our 5 year anniversary.

So now instead of being whisked away to spend 3 carefree days and 2 steamy nights in glamorous New York City I have been reduced to sleeping at my mother in law’s house. In a full-size bed. Next door to my teenage sisters in law. With my 4 year old sleeping on the floor at the foot of our bed and my 2 year old most likely nestled between me and my husband.

You can see why a girl can start to look a bit desperate and crazy around the eyes.

So Jimmy, if you can help a girl out, please send us some tickets. We don’t even need chairs, we’ll sit at the back of the room and try and duck to see under the stage lights. Or we’ll dress up like cowboys and dance behind the Roots like that one guy did that one time (my husband says I was hallucinating but I swear I saw him) or if you can at least tell me the name of the musical guest I’ll make a last ditch effort to get in the band. Are the Roots having any kind of audtions?

If this is not within your power or your desires I can understand. But like the Moochers Association of America taught me, it never hurts to ask.

Many thanks!
-Kristina Foutz

p.s. I may have sent multiple copies of this letter to different places in the hopes that at least one got through to someone. So . . . if you get like 80 I am really terribly sorry.
Jimmy carefully considering my  request.